three steps towards a more positive mind

Three basic steps toward a positive mind:                                                                                                            By Lilach Tzingoker

Some three years ago I joined an ashram; I gave up my job my furniture and my very much loved cat. I knew it was for the greatest good. I remember standing on top of a hill overlooking the nearby forest and thinking: ‘Oh boy what have I done!’

The simple life style that was practiced in the Ashram brought on many challenges, some of these challenges one will only face if he was to take on such journey. The lessons I have learned there however, can be shared to some degree:

While living in the ashram I didn’t n watch television, I didn’t watch movies read the newspaper or listen to the news, the world outside did not exist! My mind had no distractions, it had to face it’s on self. This is not a simple step for any one’s mind. The outcome was at first unpleasant, there was so much of myself that I had to face. As a result my mind became quieter, finally the observer gained the dominant place in the mind, now it was able to make choices and direct the mind in the desired direction.    

Think about all the negative media around, gossip magazine, crime stories, bad marriage, terrorism and so much more. On top of which, the movies we all find so entertaining, are exposing us to an ever-increasing world of horror and disaster. While entertaining, the constant exposure to negativity is creating a busy and negative mind. More so, the nerves which are stretched in anticipation for a climax and tension, in a movie or any other entertainment form, are creating an addiction.  A rash your body demands, you will recognise the need and say:  ‘I feel like watching an action movie’. There is nothing wrong with watching a good action movie, however if you wish for a more positive mind try these few simple steps, once you have a positive mind you can watch action movies again.       

I recommend a rehab form negative media:

First step: no more gossips magazines.  

Second step; stop gossiping, simply cut it out of your conversation, the only person who suffer from the judgment is the one who judge, for you are the one who is left, it is such a waist of energy and such a waste of the use of one’s mind!  Instead try and find the good in people, this may not be easy at first but with a daily effort you will get there.

Third step: try and cut out the new if you can, what good does it do to you? Can you change any of the crimes that are been reported? Instead surf the net for good stories, happy stories; these will remind you that there are many good people out there.

At this point in human development the negative force is louder, in my opinion it is simply part of human evolution, some of my friends think that humans are inherently faulty, I disagree, we simply did not learn to act differently, we are now with more aportunaty then ever before to open our minds and our eyes to changes from with in, this is the very nature of human evoltion.    

We have the power to change, some may think that I am been naive, but I have seen the ugly side of humanity, I experienced it firsthand more than twice,  I refused to lose myself to it. I am a living proof that good is stronger than bad.

Try these first few and simple steps in your everyday life, do not give yourself hard time if you did not achieve your goal every day, instead be aware of where you fall short, forgive yourself (very important!) and try again the next day. You will feel better; you will have more energy for much of your energy will be freed to be used in a good constrictive ways.

Go ahead give a go. You can even let me how it went...      

too much positive thinking?

Too much Positive thinking,

Can there be an overdose of positive thinking?  The answer to that is No, there is no such thing as too much positive thinking. The right question to ask here is:  Can one slide his mind into denial instead of positive thinking? The answer to that is yes, there is a thin line between the two.             

Throughout the years I met many who tried the positive thinking theory, most of those who failed had a similar symptom. Often they will not be willing to listen to others advice. They were pretty sure they got it together and that what they doing will work out. I will have to watch them silently, as they deliver themselves into a world of denial which clean on to their emotions and create a not so positive situation. For example:

 a friend of mine overstayed his visa, he wanted very much to get a new visa and maid up in his mind that he will create the situation he will think positively, he will create a situation just like the book the secret describe the outcome without a doubt will be desirable. And so my friend applied for different jobs asking them to sponsor him but was offered none of the positions. At some point my friend did not share his thoughts and activities, he didn’t want anyone to shine a different light on the situation and risk the possibility of a negative thought entering his perfect little world of positive thinking. My friend had put a deadline on the whole visa project and booked a return ticket from Australia to the UK.

The day has come for my friend to get on the plan, he left behind most of his belonging and even organised a place to stay on his return, it was all part of his positive thinking project.  Two weeks later I got a phone call, he wasn’t allowed back in Australia for the next seven years!  He thought that positive thinking does not work,I said: 'you were in denial'. He was even in a denial about the denial. He won’t be trying positive thinking again anytime soon.     

If you doing what my friend did you are not practicing positive thinking you are creating a denial in your own head you are been unrealistic. What is the different? You ask, let’s take the above situation a positive thinking would be more like this:

Yes I over stayed my visa and yes there is a strong possibility that I will not be allowed back in. But I have had a great experience; I will take what I have learned with me. I will do my best to fix the situation and if it all fails surly another door will open. A negative thought will something like this: I am going to be in so much trouble I hate the UK what am I going to do? I have wasted so many years in Australia and for what?   

With the example above I hope I answer some of your questions. A positive mind doesn’t necessarily mean problem free life but it removes the blinds of negativity and allows you to see that even though some things didn’t work out there are other doors who will open. For every end has a beginning, it really does!

Another important point to consider is repetition, if you are hopping for something different to happen take a different course of action. If you take a left turn every day or your life you will end up on the left side every day of your life were the same trees grow and the same wind blow. if you want to go in a different direction try taking the right turn for a change, and even thought you don’t know where it leads too, it will take you somewhere you never been to before, if you keep your mind open you will find that doors did open.                              

why does positive thinking fail?

Why does positive thinking fail?

Searching the Internet for new information about positive thinking, I have come across the above title, nothing else was added, that was it, just a title. While considering answering the question myself, I kept on surfing the net for similar topics. I found one article that claimed, amongst other thing, that according to some studies, women who were mildly depressed are more likely to live longer, simply because, they are less likely to live life with activities, which could lead to their early death(?!). The writer of the article went on and on about the bad outcome of positive thinking.

My first respond is: ‘well there is one example for why positive thinking fails’, my next respond is: what do we try to achieve? Are we looking for a never ending life of miseries? Or are we looking for a happy life, well lived life? From observation I find that we, humans, look for different ways to better our lives. Yes we have different interpretation for what happiness means, but if you are walking down the street, healthy with a big smile on your face what else matters? This is a place we all want to be and I call it HAPPY LAND.

So why does positive thinking fail?

Each and every one of us has a relationship with oneself. It is the nature of that affiliation which   determine ones happiness. If you love yourself you will give yourself only the things that make you happy. Those who don’t love themselves will give everything else and everyone else first priority, and there for be unhappy. This relationship starts in the mind. A negative Patten of thoughts will create an unhealthy relation with oneself. And that is why we want to have a positive mind.

 The word relationship is defined by the Macquarie Dictionary as a connection. For as long as we are alive, we have a connection with/to ourselves. One must ask; what is the nature of that connection? Since we cannot stop the relationship with our own self, we must maintain it for the length of our physical life. The mind as a part of the self, is where much of the connection is maid, there for the Patten of the mind is where happiness starts and end. If you are trying to change the Patten of your mind to a more positive one do it first for the sake of happiness and the rest will fallow. But just as you can’t stop having a connection with yourself, you can’t stop the training of your mind. It’s like blaming the dietitian for gaining all the weight again, after stoping the diet he prescribed. its worth considering that ones life style is where the problem stars and end.

Positive thinking will fail if you give up before you get to the finish line.        

how does positive thinking work?

we all have an on going conversation in our mind, most of us thought, are so lost in that dialog that we are unaware of it. sometime there is more than one conversations. the nature of this silent internal chat is where thing begin and end.

many yogis are aiming for a silent mind, a mind that does not have an on going broken record, it is than that the mind will be open for everything else. if you ever hinged out with real yogis the last is not a new concept  for you, but if you did not yet have the pleasure of such company take a moment to consider this;

we are all part of this planet the universe and everything beyond, it does not matter if you believe in God or the big bang, for both have the same concept of: 'we all come from the same stuff' , there for we are all affected by the same stuff... scientists proved again and again that waives of all kinds are streaming through the atmosphere from all directions, light waves, radio waves and so on...

our mind, in my opinion and personal experience, is like a radio, all we have to do is tune in... but if we are already tuned to one radio station, we can not listen to another... in a progressive stage, when ones mind is quieter, it can tune in to some of the best waves of creation... the very origin of inspiration itself.

A quieter mind is not easy to obtain but it is not on the impossible lists either;  

if the radio station your mind is tuned too plays negative sound, every thing in life no matter how Rossie or how blue, will sound and feel like the worst thing in the world, positive thinking is about changing the radio station you are listening too... when we listen to happy energetic music we are uplifted are we not? sound has a great impact on our feelings... so what effect will the sound of your own mind have on you?

how to change the radio station your mind is tuned too? medittaion is one way...             

love and the child's soul

I am fascinated with life the purpose of it, why we are here what is life all about... I ask many questions and look at life from as many angles as I can. as someone who was homeless, a solder and an apprentice of the renounced order of life, I have a wide variety of angles form which I can reflect upon life.

Mostly I was stunned by what I have learned about the value of love, family and being a parent. I come from a background of dark negative world, people used to say to me:  'it must be hard without a family" my reply for many years was: "I never had a family and there for I don't know what I am missing".  slowly as I heal my pain and peal off the lairs of the iron shield I've built, I come to batter understand what  I have missed.

 And so, through observation of all that I did not have, and through the lounging for the perfect parents one could have had,  I learned about the value of a family. with every new understanding I have about the value of life and the big part love has in it, I become inspired to give what it is I never had, to as many children as I can, and so I write.

think about love, feel it, do not take it for granted. so many who has love take it for granted and give it a bad name. family is the most important experience and gift one can be blessed with. As the dark skies of my world were penetrated by the warm light of love, life and people, I felt warmth for the first time... tears of joy and pain filled my eyes. I felt as if God himself was holding me comforting me, as I realised just how much pain I have endured all these years. that feeling is a feeling of rebirth, of a new life. it gives everything in life a taste so intense I often smile and laugh.

I walk down the streets with admiration for every display of love I see, between parents and their children. I feel anger, when I see the opposite and have to control my strong urge, to get involved and protect the soul from its unforgiving parent.

In the Vedic literature, Motherhood is the most valued profession of all. Yes profession, being a parent is so much more than feeding the youngsters and making sure that they have all the material possessions they can have. been a parent is about passing on, every bit of wisdom you had the chance to acquire, with a gentle and loving approach.

Its about knowing that, your child is part of the big picture of what it is you are going to leave behind, its about knowing that our responsibility to the life force which is with in us, is to make sure that it could continue living through our children in the most beautiful way.

Our children are the future, they are the reason for every long term action we do. attend to your child with much love, spent time with your child, show him/her that you care. Remember that although we, humans, are able to adapt to every situation, we have souls which are made of pure gold. That gold shines less, with every negative impact, sometimes it gets covered by dark emotions, in such a large quantity that it forgets that it is gold. Make sure your child never forget that it is maid out of the purest, strongest yet fragile substance of all. the soul.
               
   

questions and activites for Sonny's Adventure In Mystery Park

The paten of one’s thoughts is greatly influenced by the immediate surroundings, and by the actions of the people in those surroundings. I am a great believer in the power of thoughts, for all actions begin with a thought. Educating and raising children, to be the best that they can be, is a form of art in my eyes. It requires an open mind imagination and a large heart. This book is an attempt to give readers of all ages, a fun and gentle introduction to positive thinking. ‘Sonny’s Adventure in Mystery Park’ can be red, like other books, for the purposes of entertainment. The positive way in which the story unfolds, in its self, will have a subtle influence in the right direction. The quiet affect of the positive influence is usually discovered over time, simply because of its smooth nature. On the other hand, entertainment form which elements of aggression and horror unfold, will have a faster and more notable influence, due to its loud nature.


I recommend reading the book for sake of entertainment fist. On a separate occasion read the book again with the intention to carry out the activities listed billow. The questions are laid out in order of pages. You may choose not to act on all the activities at once, in fact, I recommend that you will break the conversation/activity, as soon as you see that the child’s concentrations spend has run out. The break can be as long as you need it to be. There are no set rules; you should consider the child’s nature in that regard.

The freedom to exercise the expression of thoughts will promote and stimulate the mind to search for original thoughts.

Have Fun.

 Questions and activities for page six:

Choose one player to act as the keeper of the park, (usually the adult or the oldest in the group).The kipper of the park cannot allow just any one into the park, only those who believe in heaving fun can enter. And so, the kipper must find out, who out of the kids knows what fun is all about. And so the keeper of the park asks:

 Do you believe in heaving fun?

 What do you do for fun? Show me...

 Is it important to have fun? Why?

 Do you like making new friends?

 How do you make new friends and where?

Here, you can ask the child/children, to act as if they don’t know each other. They will then pretend to make friends with one another (or with you). This line of questions can help you find out more about how well the child does in his/hers social group.

 Questions and activities for page 9 to 11:

Now that I know, that you kids love to have fun I need to find out if you can find unusual sounds (says the keeper of the park)

 Have you ever heard an unusual sound?

 What did it sound like?

 Can you make an unusual sound?

These questions are all about fun, allow the child to express his/her thoughts and imagination. The keeper of the park will then teach the child/children how to find the direction of a sound, just as Sonny did...

 Chose who is going to be the whistling wind, the others will sit in a circle and close their eyes. The job of the whistling wind is to whistle quietly or make a quiet and soft sound, while standing in one place. The children, with their eyes closed, then need to guess from which direction the whistling/sound is coming from. When the child/ children, find the direction of the whistle/sound, someone else can be the new whistling wind. (Turn can be taken if there are only two of you playing the game). Try and finish the game well before the children lose interest in it.

This game gets the child/children to exercise their sense of hearing and alertness to their surroundings.

 Questions for page 17.

 Why is Sonny worried?

 Would you be worried if you were on a flying swing? Why?

 Can you make a worried face?

 Is it important to let others know how you feel? Why?


 And now the keeper of the park will say with a kind voice: In Mystery Park we can ask any question we want! When we ask questions and get answers, we have more information about something we didn’t know before. In Mystery Park we are not shy to ask questions.

 Anyone have a question?

 Question for page 18:

 Why does Sonny wants to go to a place no other kid has been to before?

 Do you want to go to such a place? Why?

Here you can learn if the child wants to be away from everyone and why. The answer to the above question from Sonny’s point of view is: because it will be an adventure no one else had yet hade. If the child did not come up with a comparable answer, do sagest it: “maybe he (Sonny) wants to be the first one to have fun in a new place”. This is the first direct introduction of positive thinking to the child, (one can want to go somewhere just for the fun of it). There is no need to ‘over do it’, suggesting the different way of thinking will do the job.

 Questions for page 20:

The concept of trust and understanding ones gut feeling is pointed out here. In order to build trust so that the child will feel free to speak truthfully, tell them about a time you yourself got into trouble.

 Why isn’t Sonny afraid anymore?

 Did you ever get into trouble? What for?

 Did you have a funny feeling in your stomach when you did that?

 Did you know that what you were doing was going to get you in trouble?

 If the answer is yes ask:

 Did you know that you made a bad choice?

 How did it feel in your stomach when you did that?

 Tell me about a time you made a good choice/ a time you did something good.

 Were your family/friends, happy with you when you made a good choice? Did it feel good in your stomach when you did that?

In Mystery Park we like to make choices that give us, our friends and our family a good feeling.

 Questions for page 23:

 What are you really good at?

 Are you as good as your friends or better?

 Can you show me?

Allow the child to be confident about their abilities and do not challenge their self image... If the child cannot name anything that he/she, is good at, help by naming different activities such as sport, reading, games of some kinds and so on, this will help boiled his/her confidence.

 How do you know when something is wrong?

If the child find this question challenging remind them of the game you played in order to find the direction of the sound. And ask the question again. Here you can find out if the child is under some kind of negative influence, or bulling as children know what they know from their immediate surrounding

 Questions for page 25:

 In the story it says that Sonny did some thinking, what does it mean ‘to do some thinking’?

 Do you do some thinking? When? Give me an example.

 Can you think now about what you would have done if you were like Sonny stuck in a storm?

Here you can choose to play a little game of hide and seek. Choose an object and get the child to hide it. If the child had hiding the object in an obvious place do find it quickly and then hide it well yourself. When it’s the child turn to hide the object again tell the child to do some thinking and hide the object really well. You can stop playing the game after the child had hiding the object for the second time and continue with the line of questions.

 Is it important to think for yourself?

Use the game above as an example for the result of ‘doing some thinking.

 What would have happen to Sonny if he didn’t do some thinking?

 Questions/activities for page 27 :

Here (page 27) Sonny is being realistic, although he wasn’t worried, things didn’t change. Sonny has to consider that he was wrong before and that it was time to act. Sonny is using the energy of his anger in a constructive way. (It is better to be angry and act on it than to stay passive and think that there is nothing you can do). It is important however to use the anger in a positive way. With the next line of questions we will try to do just that.

 Why did Sonny get angry?

 Was he right to get angry?

 What did he do when he got angry?

(Read the page again if necessary in order for the child to find the answer, help the child find the answer if needed)

 Do you get angry?

 Tell me about a time you got very angry.

 War you right to get angry?

 What happened after you got angry what did you do?

 What happened after that?

Make a conclusion: If someone is angry for a good reason it is important to say something in a smart and polite way.

 Question for page 33:

With this next line of questions we will help the child understand that they can make their dream come true.

 Did you ever make a wish?

 Did it come true?

 Do you have a new wish? What is it?

 If the child’s wish is tangible ask:

 Can you get it yourself? (if the answer is yes ask how)

If the answer is no, show the child that if he/she really wants, they can get and achieve anything. If it’s a toy that they want, he/she, can save their pocket money, and purchase the item. If they don’t get pocket money, suggest the option of work. .

 What do you want to do when you grow up?

Discuss with the child about the steps he/she needs to take in order to become whatever it is they want to become. Conclude with ‘nothing is impossible!’

Planting a seed and allowing it to grow. That is all we have to do....

welcome to my blog

welcome to my blog,

here I invite you to comment and interact with me and my other readers.

I will write as often as I can, so please to check in on a regular basis, comment if you wish and share your thoughts and experiences, the name of the game is positive thinking...